I've noticed that I've spent more time posting (what I hope are) thoughtful responses to LinkedIn questions...than blogging. Soooo, I've decided to copy and paste some of my LinkedIn answers over here.
A great question was posted in the Linked 2 Leadership group the other day by Gregory Gull:
Why is leadership so rare? I mean the real leadership we all truly need.
Leadership can’t be defined as a characteristic of an individual since it is an emergent property of the relationship between individuals. In short, leadership has to do with a ‘We’ and not with a ‘Me’. Analogously, neither hydrogen nor oxygen has the characteristic of wetness, yet water is wet. There can be no leadership with (just) one individual! …
Mine was the 34th answer, so it's clear this was a popular topic ~
The older I get...the smarter my parents become, no?
My parents have both been volunteers and leaders in my hometown. I was taking a leadership class a number of years ago, and interviewed my dad on his view of leadership, and his leadership style. Since he'd been on our city council, on numerous committees, boards and commissions...I thought he'd talk about how he saw his role in those organizations.
Instead, his big emphasis was on how he (and my mom) had tried their best to be good leaders...at home. Only now, as a wife and mother of teens, do I fully begin to appreciate the wisdom of his words. While our children watch us all the time, as teens they begin to integrate what they've observed with the world around them. While they often struggle against our guidelines and restrictions, it is a time when self-control and denial of self are being developed on a broader level.
To be a good driver, you must deny that impulse to go fast and get to your destination more quickly. To get good grades, you must have the self-control to stay home from the movies to do homework. To be a good friend, you learn to listen and not jump in right away with answers. Etc.
Far too many of today's "leaders" seem to never have left the adolescent "it's all about ME" stage...and in our relatively peaceful, prosperous nation, denial of self hasn't been much in evidence or much encouraged. We haven't needed to sacrifice much of anything in comparison to earlier generations. Sacrifice builds character...which is what these leaders lack.
Add in the retreat of organized religion (particularly Christianity with its emphasis on service to others and denial of self) from the public arena to the private sphere.
Mix well with an advertising and popular media culture of self-indulgence vs. self-control over the last 30-40 years..and you have a recipe for narcissistic "me'ism" that is the direct opposite of "servant leadership". To be a servant leader...you need to serve. You need to elevate others above self.
It's clearly still a part of our culture (see: law enforcement and the military for examples of people who run toward danger to save others), but not as widely accepted, encouraged or acknowledged in the general community at large.
How do you build "servant leaders" when leaders "succeed" materially with no expectations of self-sacrifice? Thinking that "training" or "coaching" or "mentoring" will solve this problem is similar to caulking the cracks in your basement...when the river is flooding outside your door. The caulking isn't going to do much good if the river rises above the threshold of your doorway.
You might want to consider the question "how do I/we build character?" before you consider what "solutions" might be effective.
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